Record I
Patient A: "So how... this book not bad yah?"
Patient B: "Yah agree, excellent! Astounding work. No nonsense, sharp and
concise to the point. But there's a major flaw in this piece of art –
too
many character names to remember!!!"
Nurse: "Hey! Can the two of you put the telephone book back to the
original
place?"
Record II
A doctor asked a patient: "If I were to cut one of your ears off, what
will
happen to you?"
Patient: "Then I will not be able to hear..."
Doctor: "Hmm…that's normal...so if I were to cut your other ear off,
what
will happen then?"
Patient: "I will not be able to see..."
The doctor became nervous and asked: "Why would you not see then???"
Patient: "Because my spectacles will fall off..."
Record III
IMH has an old lady who wears black, carries a black umbrella and squats
at
the entrance to the IMH everyday without fail, rain or shine.
The doctor wanted to administer treatment for her but decided to
understand
her behavior first.
So, the doctor also wears black and carries a black umbrella; squatted
besides her everyday. The days go by...the two of them squatted
side-by-side w/o a single exchange of word. After one solid month, the old
lady finally broke the silence and asked the doctor: "Err...Excuse me! Are
you also a mushroom?"
Record IV
A nurse saw a patient writing a letter. She got curious and went to take a
peek. But the patient didn't wanna let her see.
Nurse (unable to contain her curiosity): "Who are you writing to?"
Patient: "I'm writing a letter to myself..."
Her curiosity grew and she thought to herself (Why would someone write a
letter to himself?)
So she asked again: "So...what's written inside?"
Patient (got impatient): "You crazy ah? I haven't received the letter, how
would I know??"
Record V
Two patients escape from the IMH. They climbed up a tree and one of them
fell from the tree and started rolling on the ground.
After a while, the patient below shouted to the one on top: "Hey! How come
you are not coming down yet?"
The patient on top replied: "No. no...I can't...I'm not ripe yet"
Record VI
One patient visited the doctor: "Doc...How? I think I'm a chicken since
the
day I was born..."
Doctor: "Wah! That’s very serious...Why do you only come and seek
treatment
now?"
Patient: "Because my family needs me to hatch the eggs..."
Record VII
One truck driver was doing his usual delivery to IMH.
He discovered a flat tyre when he was about to go home. He jacked up the
truck and took the flat tyre down. When he was about to fix the spare
tyre,
he
accidentally dropped all the bolts into the drain. As he can't fish the
bolts out, he started to panic.
One patient happened to walk past and asked the driver what happened.
The driver thought to himself, since there's nothing much he can do; he
told the patient the whole incident.
The patient laughed at him & said "can't even fix such a simple
problem...no wonder you are destined to be a truck driver..."
Here’s what you can do, take one bolt each from the other 3 tyres and
fix
it onto this tyre. Then drive to the nearest workshop and replace the
missing ones, easy as that"
The driver was very impressed and asked "You're so smart but why do are
you
here at the IMH?"
Patient replied: "Hello, I stay here because I'm crazy not STUPID!"
羚兒說：emm～～很搞笑對不對～大家看看笑笑就好哦～
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